Taking The Easy Way

Photo from: pixdaus.com

As I was growing up the adults in my life repeatedly reminded me about the evils of taking the easy way... but I don't think this staircase is what they had in mind! This stairway makes you do all the work on the way up--then you can slide the rest of the way down! Whhhhheeeee! Kind of like sliding down a banister...but better.

Of course I suppose I would also have been reminded to be more lady-like... and to modulate my voice (because there's no way to take this slide without yelling on the way down!) I also don't think this stairway would have worked well in mini skirts (or at least not for the slider). The view for the guys at the bottom... well I guess they'd enjoy the view but my face would be crimson!

I laughed when I showed this to my husband whose first reaction was "wow wish we'd had one at the frat house in college." Although I suspect he meant it would have made getting downstairs after a few beers would have been much easier than taking a circular stairway or any other stairs! Not that I think they'd have objected to the view of female party goers sliding down in skirts!

Do you take the easy way out in life? Or do you just see this stair-slide as a reminder to keep a little bit of the child in all of us. Yes, this photo is just full of life lessons.  Too bad Mom, you missed your chance to turn this one into a life lesson for me... maybe for the great grands?

Dancing for Old Ladies -- Life Lessons From Dance Class

One of the greatest life lessons was learned in dance class.  No, I wasn't one of those cute little five year olds in dance class, I was a chunky seventeen year old!  Classified by two of those cute little things as 'an old lady,' at 17!

Dance class...seemed impossible.  But together with my sister and two of her friends I braved the class.  My overweight body clad in unattractive tights and a leotard, the view was... well use your imagination!  Picture Rosie O'Donnell in tights (or don't, it might freak you out!).  But that was me.  Round, out of shape, and obviously not the top candidate for doing plies and splits.  And certainly not surrounded by walls of mirrors!

But it was a challenge.  And never one to back down from a challenge I signed up and kept on going.  As the teacher urged us on to kick higher, jump higher, and try new things, she's rap out 'IF YOU FALL, FALL REACHING!' 

I can no longer do those jumps or plies, but I did learn a life lesson from her.  Her mantra 'If you fall, fall reaching' has carried me through times I thought I just couldn't do it! It was just too hard. 

So if you're facing what feels like an insurmountable problem, remember the mantra--IF YOU FALL, FALL REACHING!--Better to have tried and fallen than never to have tried at all.  We learn from both our successes in life and our failures.  I may not have turned into a great dancer but I did learn the power of perseverance in anything I attempt.  It is the journey, not the destination that counts.  And if the journey stretches you, it's a journey worth taking.

Wonder, Magic, and Imagination

A man who flies. Without a plane,without wings, he floats above us all and his performance entrances us by achieving what most would deem impossible. While I know deep down there is a 'trick' to this David Copperfield performance, I can't help but be entranced and feel a kinship with him.

Not just with Copperfield's performance but his ideas about dreaming and imagination. You see, I was that little girl who wanted to 'fly.' I wanted to live my dreams. I still do.

I grew up rich in many things, but most of all rich in imagination and dreams. I'm not sure what was richer, my dreams or my real life. But my dreams helped me through times when like most children I felt alone, lost, or forgotten in the world. My dreams were my own personal therapist and my own personal guidance counselor.  They supported me and guided me whenever I needed it. 

This is probably why I devoured books - any kind, any length, any topic. I admit,I grew up with my nose buried in romance novels. Not that I didn't know they weren't 'real,' I did. I knew nothing was THAT perfect. I just believed in the magic in them. Most of all I believed in the magic of love, friendship and caring. I believed that by giving love to others I could work to effect change.

What was your dream? Have you achieved it? Did you grow up and lose your dreams? Or are you one of the lucky few who are living their dreams?

I believe in living your dreams. It's what makes life full and worth living. It challenges me to be the best I can be in life.  It's what I challenged my daughters to do.  What people in my life challenged me to do.

And while I never saw this video before today, I always knew for me one of the most important life lessons I learned is to try to achieve those dreams and to never lose them. It keeps the magic in my life and in my soul.  What would life be without magic, wonder, and imagination?

History and contemporary life both are filled with men and women who are living their dreams.  Are you one of them?

Etta May -- Or Food For Thought About Turning The Other Cheek

Etta May is one of those people you meet in life you never forget. She taught me life lessons I was glad for long after I met her in high school.  She taught me the importance of turning the other cheek.

Who was Etta May? Etta May was in my Foods class in Lenape Regional High School. She was what was known in the 1970s as 'mentally retarded' but would now be described as 'intellectually challenged.' Whatever you want to call it Etta May was one person who taught me important life lessons-the value of independence for everyone no matter what their abilities and of meeting unkindness with kindness.

I admit, in school I was one of those kids in the advanced classes. Foods was a class I took to avoid study hall. I wasn't really expecting to learn a lot, although in the end I learned more important life lessons there than in any advanced English, Science or History class I ever took. 

Etta May wasn't a beauty, but she always smiled. She wasn't always able to read the directions for recipes, but she was unfailingly NICE to everyone. She tried her best. She looked for the good in every person and inevitably found something in everyone to admire. And she taught me the value of teamwork and that everyone on the team has something to contribute.

Etta May was on my team in Foods Class.  This meant I and the three other girls in the class worked with her on a daily basis.  We all reacted differently to Etta May's challenges. One girl was a bully and cruel, we all ran interference because we thought Etta May needed our help. 

What we didn't realize was she'd known this girl her entire life and had learned her own ways to deal with her with no help from us. She simply turned the other cheek. I know, it sounds so, goody two shoes.  But it worked.  The more Etta May met (I'll call her Maureen, not her real name) Maureen's barbs with kindness the more Maureen was frustrated at not being able to bully Etta May.

The other three girls worked with Etta May but tried to do things for her without giving her a chance to try herself.  I showed Etta May how to do it and then let her do it herself.  Seeing her sense of pride in her attempts (some of which were successful, some not) made it worth it.  While her work wasn't always perfect, the teacher and I had an unspoken agreement that it was more important to let Etta May try than to have a perfect result. 

Etta May's pride in her accomplishments were something I'll never forget.  Be the accomplishment big or small, she was thrilled she'd done it herself.  I can't take responsibility for the way I treated her, that would be 'thank you Mom' who was the queen of teaching us things without making it seem like she was even trying and letting us learn how to do it even if it wasn't perfect the first time.

Years later the lessons Etta May taught me came back to me when I was faced with the challenge of having two daughters with similar disabilities. I was also faced with helping them help themselves or taking the easy way of out by doing things for them. 

Thanks to Etta May's unwitting but valuable guidance (even though she never knew she taught  me anything) I became the mother my children needed.  Etta May made me a strong advocate of mainstreaming and independence for the differently able. 

There were many times it would have been easier to do things for my daughters.  But they're grown up now and both live on their own and hold down jobs. Without the lessons learned from Etta May I might have been a very different kind of mother to them.  There lives might be very different than they are today.

I've often wished I could find Etta May and just give her a hug--she helped ME so much. She taught me life lessons I wouldn't have gotten any else in my education. And better yet, as every mother knows, she helped my children, even though she never knew them. (We all know that people who help our children are high on our lists of favorite people). She changed my attitude and outlook so I could help them. So if anyone out there knows where Etta May is today, give her a hug from me and my family.

Growing Up Watching Birdfeeders

Growing up we always had bird feeders outside our windows.  Over the years we watched squirrels consume more birdseed than the birds--finally along came feeders that let us feed just the birds, not the squirrels.  The grosbeaks and cardinals finally triumphed over mangy gray squirrels!

Sometimes the squirrels were defeated by technological feats designed by birders, sometimes the use of simple home grown ideas did the trick. And other times, alas, the squirrels consumed all the seed meant for the birds we loved.

Super Stop A Squirrel Wild Bird Feeder by Homestead (available on Amazon.com and other retailers)(I do not personally recommend any feeders, just providing some options for your to explore, please research their efficacy on your own)

Defeating the marauding squirrels became a family pastime.  To me defeating the squirrels became a life lesson in caring for the people in our lives who were important to us and avoiding the toxic people who try to steal all the seeds of joy from life.

 Are you a bird or a squirrel?  Are you on the side of the birds or the squirrels? Hmmmm...

Welcome to "Defeating The Squirrels and Other Life Lessons "

Do you feed the birds? Do squirrels steal the bird food at your house? This blog is about the life lessons I learned from observing nature and learning from my mother and other people who were influential in my life. 

We all have someone in our lives who has helped us find our way through the tough times--or just through the maze of our lives.  Sometimes it's a mother, sometimes it's a friend or family member, sometimes a teacher or minister.  No matter who it is for you this blog celebrates those lessons and the people who taught us those home truths. 

If you have a life lesson you learned from your mother or another influential person in your life email me about doing a guest post.  (Photo courtesy of http://www.birdsforever.com/mugshot.html where you can purchase tee shirts with this photo on it).